When I Am Undone

IMG_1135Have you ever been “undone”? You know…unglued. The word may have different meanings for different people depending upon circumstances. My goodness, I’ve been literally, figuratively and spiritually undone many times in my life…if that’s possible. Of course I’m a bit of an expressionist. So, to clarify allow me to explain the “Nina-differences”.

To be undone means to

-literally untie, unwrap, unfasten something.

-figuratively realize that something hasn’t gone as planned.

-spiritually in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “Then I said, ‘Woe is  me, for I am ruined (undone)! Because I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips; For my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of Hosts.'” Isaiah 6:5

 

Literally, I can’t explain how I feel when circumstances seem to unwrap my heart’s emotions and unfasten feelings neatly packaged and tied with a string.

Figuratively, I can’t tell you how many times in my life things haven’t gone according to my plan.

Spiritually, I can’t describe what happens in the very depths of my soul when I’ve found myself in the presence of my holy, gracious, and merciful God.

 

It happened the other week. I found myself face-to-face with temptation. Literally, staring it in the face. Figuratively, completely caught off guard. (I won’t tell you what the temptation was because temptation comes in all shapes and sizes. It’s different for each one of us. If I tell you what this was to me then you might not identify.) Spiritually, I came completely unglued when God showed Himself in the midst of it.

The wonder of this testimony is that I actually stared temptation down and, as I did, God came to my rescue. I cannot remember the last time I was so spiritually undone. God didn’t send an angel I could visibly see. He didn’t strike the enemy with a sword or knock him off his feet. He didn’t send a lightning bolt or even an intercessor. No. He did something I never would’ve expected. He sang to me.

Literally, I heard His song in my heart. He unwrapped the tangled nerves in my ears and I heard it loud and clear.

Figuratively, when I thought I might give in to temptation He came unexpectedly. He caught me completely off guard proving that He had a plan meant to get my attention.

Spiritually, the wonder of His presence was very real to me.

 

I was completely undone.

 

“My chains are gone

I’ve been set free

My God, my Savior has ransomed me

And like a flood His mercy reigns

Unending love, amazing grace.” (Amazing Grace, My Chains Are Gone by Chris Tomlin)

 

Just as Isaiah realized that silence was necessary, humility desired, and holy fear understood I found myself entirely wrapped up in the presence of El Elyon, the Lord of Hosts. When Isaiah heard the Voice of the Almighty he

literally unwrapped his heart,

figuratively lost himself in a powerful, unexpected moment with His God, and

spiritually accepted the atoning work of God and surrendered to His call.

 

How I wanted to do the same.

 

As the haunting voice of God rang in my ears and the melody of Amazing Grace drifted through my inner self I kept silent and just let myself rest in His presence. I wept in gratitude because He didn’t leave me to face temptation alone. He didn’t abandon me or turn away from me. He unwrapped my heart, came unexpectedly and reminded me of the redeeming work of Christ to save…”My God, my Savior has ransomed me…Like a flood, His mercy reigns…Unending love, amazing grace.”

 

“The earth shall soon dissolve like snow

The sun forbear to shine

But God, who called me here below,

Will be forever mine.”

 

I love how God comes to me in my vulnerability. I love how he literally, figuratively, and spiritually unwraps my heart and reminds me of His sweet, abiding Presence. I love how God loves me.

 

I can’t help it. I’m undone. Because I’m just plain amazed by Grace.

 

5 thoughts on “When I Am Undone”

    1. I’m glad God had a Word for you, Jill. I worked on this one on and off for 3 weeks and wondered if maybe it was too much sharing. You’ve confirmed God has a purpose in it. Sweet blessings…

  1. The appearance of a song or a scripture text into my consciousness is happening more frequently to me as well. And it happens when I am becoming undone emotionally or mentally. It’s an amazing thing, cause afterwards, you don’t even realise that you knew the words of this song or scripture. It reminds me of the verses of scripture that says, .’God is close to those with a broken and contrite heart….’ and ‘Thy word have I hid in my heart that I may not sin against thee.’ You wrote a response to one of my posts recently that I have found myself reflecting on over and over … about studying the word of God and meditating each day.

    I think God was able to rescue you from the Evil one, because you have kept yourself protected with His armour and shield through close contact with His word, so you were safely under His wings. Strangely, I sang that same song at church yesterday. Today, I came looking for you, and there’s that song again, speaking to my heart.

    Don’t be afraid to share your experience. It becomes a testimony that can help strengthen other saints. For, another person finding himself in that same vulnerable place, having read of the evidence of God’s faithfulness, can reflect on it and receive strength to stand like a brave and ‘face down’ the Enemy.So glad you shared it.

    1. Ms. Karen, You are such an encouragement and inspiration to me. I’m so glad our paths have crossed through our blogs. I’m so happy to see you writing and sharing from your heart so frequently now. Here’s to facing down the enemy together in the Name of Jesus…I spur you on to faith and good works, my sister!

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